If you are anything like me, you could not have been happier to see Tuesday November 6th come and go. It's not that I wasn't excited to learn the outcome of this pivotal election, but more so, I was excited that my phone would stop endlessly ringing.
There are exactly 3 people who ever call me on the phone:
1.) My
mother
2.) My father (and that's on a rather specific bi-monthly basis)
3.) A very persistent bill collector who I've been successfully dodging for years now.
So, in a normal week, I receive maybe
2-3 phone calls. Fast forward to an election year, however, and it's a
totally different story. You see, I'm lucky enough to live in Colorado, one of the so-called "battleground" states. I am also registered as neither Democrat nor Republican, which I recently learned is the equivalent of writing "I am obviously confused and unsure who to vote for. Please call me 46 times a day to convince me your candidate is the best", on your voter registration form. Lesson learned... but all of this nonsense got me thinking: Is choosing someone to vote for any different than choosing someone to date?
Obviously, in either situation, you want someone who shares your values. You want someone who is honest with you about their intentions and who keeps their promises. Nothing is worse than a politician who promises not to raise taxes, for example, then gets elected and raises them anyway. Equally disappointing, is a boyfriend who promises to take out the garbage and massage your feet then doesn't deliver.
Let's face it... whether campaigning or dating, everyone brings their A-game in the beginning in order to win over their audience. You're playing up all your best qualities and glossing over all the undesirable ones. This is understandable. Just like no politician would have a chance in hell of getting elected if he began a speech by stating his personal agenda and listing any and all special interest groups that are contributing financially to his campaign, no guy is getting a second date if on the first, he opens with "I have crippling intimacy issues, so it's great you agreed to go out with me!" Euphemisms, spin-doctoring and in the case of dating, good old-fashioned 'fake it til you make it' are the order of the day.
That being said, it would be so refreshing to find a man that could humble himself, admit to his shortcomings and be honest with you. Just once, I'd like to hear a candidate (or lover) say "I honestly don't know if I can balance the budget (give you an orgasm). But I believe I can do it; I've got some good strategies and I'm going to get in there and try my damnedest to make it happen".
As for the next election cycle, candidates please note: I would never go for the needy guy that calls me all the time telling me how important I am and needing constant reassurance that I like him. It's the quiet, mysterious loner who's been catching my eye from time to time from across the room that I'm going to gravitate toward (what up, Gary Johnson!?) And as long as he doesn't try to take away my hard-earned money, my birth-control, or my gun, I might just marry him.
