#1 Crush...

I, like many people, have limited days off to take care of a seemingly endless amount of chores and errand running. Often, there are numerous other things I would rather be doing than, say, getting groceries. However, this is why it helps to set up a few secret crushes around town... to motivate and inspire. As it stands right now, I am nursing about 8 different crushes. There's the sexy, kind- of-thuggish-looking manager at the grocery store; the super-cute, hippy, supplement guy at the natural food store; the hot, butch, tattooed girl at the oil change place... This doesn't even include all the people at work I have crushes on. Complications do arise though, especially if I let myself think too much. For example, I sometimes seek help from the cute supplement guy, even when I don't need it, which is fairly harmless. However, there are also times when I have had legitimate questions that I was suddenly very self-conscious about asking. "Can you suggest a good pro-biotic to help my digestive track?" "What's your favorite colon cleanse?" I am certain he receives these sorts of questions on a daily basis, but the last thing I want is for him to think about me pooping!! I also have a bad habit of stalking people. Not in a psycho, bunny-boiling way, just in a healthy, oh-that's-what-kind-of-car-you-drive, sort of way. It's a throwback to high school, when my friends and I would stalk each others' crushes until we had their entire class schedules memorized. Then, we could "accidently" run into them: "Oh, I didn't know you were in this class... want to walk to the library together?" We were diabolical in our plotting. Nowadays, I just have to be careful not to reveal information that I have no business knowing. The other day, while making small talk with Cutie at the register, he mentioned how cold it had been earlier that morning and how he hadn't wanted to leave his house and come to work. 'Right', I thought 'Because you ride your bike to work'. Thankfully, I stopped myself from blurting that out, thereby keeping my crush and my questionable knowledge of him, a secret for now.